A Balancing Act: What Does It Take to Be a Mother and a Leader?

When asked about her job, Deputy Secretary at the Ministry of Health (MOH) Jasmin Lau quipped: “My job is to look after my two kids.” We laughed along, but that is far from a joke. As a mother and Deputy Secretary (Policy), she plays a vital double role in ensuring that Singapore’s healthcare system has enough resources to function, as well as raising her two children.

At work, she oversees three critical policy levers - manpower, financing, and regulatory measures - that determine the success or failure of the sector. “Basically, I need to make sure the healthcare system has enough resources to function,” she shared.

But at home, she’s both an entertainer and an educator for her children: a role that begins before she steps into the office and continues until she hits the bed at midnight.

It hasn’t been a walk in the park, but the lessons she has learned along the way have been invaluable for her growth.

Balancing Motherhood and Leadership

At times, Jasmin feels as though she’s juggling the needs of two people against the entire nation. Challenges in the healthcare industry are complex and ongoing, but at the same time, her children are waiting for her attention at school or at home.

Finding the right balance between work and family is an ongoing challenge for her, and yet, it is through this set of obstacles that she has learned to become a better leader.

“After I became a mother, I fully realised what people mean when they say they struggle outside of work,” she said.

“Dealing with childcare, picking kids up from school, caring for them when they are sick—a lot of these things actually do affect people’s performance at work. So nowadays, when someone is not doing as well as they can, my first question to them is, ‘How are you?’—not how are you doing at work, but how are you doing in your personal life?”

Reflecting on her leadership journey, Jasmin acknowledges that in the past, she wasn’t always someone her colleagues could easily open up to. However, becoming a mother has deepened her empathy and understanding of the challenges public officers face outside of work.

Today, Jasmin consciously invests more effort in spending time with her staff in ‘cosy, one-on-one chats,’ where she engages in open discussions about their life goals. She believes that, ultimately, our career goals should align with our personal life goals.

This approach makes interactions more personal, allowing her to better connect with the public officers she works with.

Her IVF Journey Taught Her Empathy and Resilience

Apart from MOH, Jasmin has worked with various government agencies, including the Public Service Division, the Ministry of Manpower, the Ministry of Finance, and the Economic Development Board (EDB). Her various postings enabled her to work with different leaders in the Service, each of whom have shaped her own perspective on leadership.

During her time at EDB, she underwent In-Vitro Fertilisation (IVF) treatments, a challenging journey that taught her the value of empathy. The support she received from her team and her leaders at EDB was invaluable—they offered her significant flexibility, acknowledging the emotional and physical demands of the treatment.

For Jasmin, results always came after hard work. As a student, putting in the extra effort always yielded her better grades, and running that extra mile gave her a leg up in sports.

With motherhood, however, the journey wasn’t always as straightforward. The first time she underwent IVF treatment, she recalled breaking down when the embryo implantation did not go as planned.

This experience turned out to be a valuable lesson for her—she learned how to better manage her emotions when things did not go as desired, and to move forward even when the results were unfavourable—a principle that she also applies in her professional life.

Being the “First Among Equals”

Although Jasmin might seem like a natural-born leader, she confessed that she never felt entirely comfortable leading a team before stepping into leadership roles within the Public Service.

Apart from motherhood and her mentors, most of her leadership lessons were picked up through playing competitive netball and basketball, although her aching knees are objecting more strongly these days, she joked.

Jasmin approaches leadership as being the “first among equals”, and this principle has remained a guiding force throughout her career.

“As a captain, you are not the boss. You are given that role maybe because you can direct the play better. Maybe you have a certain vision about opportunities, and perhaps you can galvanise your teammates better, but you are first among equals.”

Within her teams, Jasmin tries to create a culture where all her team members understand the roles they have to play and are empowered to challenge the captain’s strategies when they disagree.

Making a Difference Through the Public Service

Juggling motherhood and leadership is no easy feat, but despite having her plate full, Jasmin continues to feel a strong calling to the Public Service.

“Most of us join the Public Service because we want to make a difference,” she shared. As the old adage she grew up hearing from her parents says, she will go where the river brings her; where the nation needs her.

Watch our interview with Jasmin to find out how motherhood has transformed her approach to leadership.

Text by Yoganeetha Sivakumar. Photos by Mandy Ong